Ways to Approach Dementia Concerns With a Parent

Noticing changes in a parent’s memory or behavior can be worrisome. Thoughtfully responding to these concerns supports the parent and the rest of the family. Many people struggle to initiate these types of conversations. This article explores various approaches to dementia that can improve the circumstances for all parties involved.

Recognizing Early Signs

You may notice some minor lapses in memory or confusion, and wonder what's going on. Parents may lose things, forget dates, or tell the same story repeatedly. These signs often appear gradually. Families may feel uncertain about whether these changes are developmentally appropriate or part of something more serious. It’s crucial to observe trends and determine the right time to talk to your parent about dementia. 

Preparing for the Conversation

Before speaking with a parent, family members should combine their observations. Citing specific examples can shed light and help avoid false conclusions. Prep for a private, calm, and comfortable discussion. Having some mild probing ready sets up a debate, not a fight. Maintaining civil and clear lines of communication may also be aided by practicing what to say.

Choosing the Right Moment

The timing of your sensitive discussion is just as big a part of the equation. Choosing a relaxed time for both can ease the anxiety of the moment. Not interrupting, so part of the focus remains on the discussion. It might not be beneficial to raise concerns immediately after a rough day. But holding out for a calm, serene time promotes a better result.

Using Compassionate Language

Being gentle means to show sensitivity and care. Phrases that express concern rather than critique will help prevent a defensive response. Instead of accusing someone of something, saying something like 'You seem to forget things more often' sounds softer, for example. Responding with the intention of listening reflects empathy and fosters an atmosphere of trust. This approach validates the emotion and also reassures a parent dealing with uncertainty.

Encouraging Participation in Decisions

Involving a parent in conversations regarding their health is a source of dignity. It can help them feel their opinion is valued. Rather than deciding things for everybody else, family members can ask for alternatives or preferences. It lowers resistance and helps to empower the parent more. More cooperation and understanding result in joint decision-making.

Seeking Professional Input

Information from a healthcare provider can help determine whether memory changes are regular or need further investigation. Healthcare professionals can provide evaluations and recommendations. Dementia isn't the only cause of memory problems; some people simply have treatable conditions. One of the key benefits of early intervention is that it may also lead to better health outcomes. Professional advice often provides reassurance for families.

Supporting Emotional Well-Being

The fear of dementia can evoke fright, grief, or anger in parents and children near and far. In this situation, you want to create a sense of stability to ease their minds and know that things are okay, while still being close to the family. It may not seem like much of a deal, but it takes minds off all the bad going on, and moments of joy are all they need during times like these. So, talk about your feelings so that everyone involved can ensure they are emotionally healthy. If you need further assistance, seeking counseling or joining a support group may be beneficial for you.

Respecting Independence

Older adults, in particular, still strive for control. Maintain confidence by allowing parents to manage day-to-day tasks whenever possible, directly. Offer help only when it is genuinely needed. One maintains self-esteem through encouragement and recognition of their abilities. Cooperation happens when people feel supported, not controlled, and resistance to control only drives people away.

Creating a Support Network

Dealing with problems of dementia is better done with assistance. That is where siblings, friends, or neighbors step in to help work out the logistics and to fill the emotional void. Stay connected with this network: regular updates will keep everyone informed. Having people who are going through the same problems can help lessen the isolation you're feeling. Having a solid support network relieves some of the emotional burden for everyone involved.

Focusing on Positive Moments

Being together with some milestones adds context in dark times. Strength and hope lie in focusing on what a parent can still do. Memories of experiences together, humor, and recreation can come to their aid as a way of staying connected. Focusing on joyful experiences makes every day brighter and brings relationships closer together, even during times of separation.

Conclusion

Talking about dementia with one parent requires a lot of patience, understanding, and planning. Compassionate communication, shared decision-making, and guidance from professionals in your life will all help. Having a strong support system can make the process easier on everyone. Conducting those conversations with dignity and optimism helps families navigate their challenges and facilitates more positive outcomes in this situation.